Master Thompson's Journal

I never saw a wild thing sorry for itself.  A small bird will drop frozen dead from a bough without ever having felt sorry for itself.  – D.H. Lawrence

My upstairs neighbor knocked on my door this evening while I was in the middle of preparing dinner and said that a baby bird had fallen out of the nest that had been constructed in one of the shrubs outside our apartment building.  After a moment of hesitation; trying to decide on what to say and/or do, I stuttered a bit because I was a caught off guard and said okay.  I opened a kitchen drawer and pulled out a pair of house gloves and went down stairs.

My neighbor…already outside, pointed at the baby bird which was hopping up and down frantically in the mulch due to a damaged left wing.  I watched for a moment thinking that I had never touched a living bird before and trying to reconcile the pity and fear I was feeling for this creature because it was absolutely terrified.  I told myself I had to commit to action mainly because the neighbor was watching me, but also I had to do something for it, so I stalled for an additional moment to put on the gloves and then I walked parallel to the bird’s path.  I actually had to steel myself before I reached down to scoop up the bird and not entirely because I was a bit squeamish, but mainly because I was feeling what this creature was feeling.  It saw me coming and frantically hopped away from me and I didn’t want scare it any more then it already was, so I backed off a bit.  Then I tried again and again before I actually got the bird in my hands and three thoughts danced in my mind as I walked with the bird toward the nest:

(1) I actually have a bird in my hands and this feels strange.

(2) I hope I’m not holding it too tight.

(3) I think I’m going to have to throw these gloves away.

I got to the nest and placed the bird back in it but the bird was so terrified that it hopped out the nest and landed back in the mulch.  I looked down and the bird was breathing so hard and fast that I could feel the bird’s terror and fatigue.  My neighbor spoke what I was thinking which was to let it be for a bit to which I was most thankful because this poor thing was actually breaking my heart.  She said to me that should would figure something out and then our downstairs neighbor came out and told us that the mother and the other hatch-lings left it behind when it fell out of the nest and broke it’s wing. 

For a split second I was stunned…asking myself how a mother could leave one of it’s own behind and then I realized I was assigning human notions of compassion and empathy to creatures that have none.  Yet, as I walked up the stairs back to my apartment I thought, that can’t be right because every animal in nature has compassion and empathy so it is not that they do not have any, they simply have different constructs at work.   If they didn’t, they wouldn’t care for their young at all.  The bird’s wing was broken and I believe that this is like a horse breaking it’s leg…it’s never the same.  I opened the door and walked into my apartment and thought, “the mother actually did what had to be done.  She left a child behind because in her world she knew there was nothing more she could do for it and there are other hatch-lings to consider.”  She did something  practical, she in affect…pulled the plug.  She let go of one of her own that was technically already dead. 

Was she being pragmatic or compassionate?  Or, was she being pragmatically compassionate?

Today while doing my laundry a toy motorcycle belonging to a 5 year old boy hit my chair.  When the boy came over to get his toy I introduced myself and he reciprocated.  As we discussed the matters that weight heavy on the minds of 5 year olds, I noticed the boy (Aiden) was preoccupied with an ant on the floor.  I said, “don’t hurt him” and he replied “no I’m trying to help him, he looks lost.” 

I took out a business card I had in my pocket and helped him wrangle the ant on it and we went out side and put him in the dirt.  I said “Aiden, you saved an ant today” and he smiled and said “yeah”!  I said “this is what we call compassion; can you say that word…compassion”?  He repeated the word, “compassion” and smiled.

The Big Bang, or the moment the entire universe was compressed into a singularity smaller then the size of a dime from which it expanded to its current state 13.7 billion years ago, is referred to by some spiritualists as The Cosmic Egg.

The question of which came first, the chicken or the egg is one of humankind’s immortal questions and it is a question that goes back as far as the ancients.  Greek historian Mestrius Plutarchus wrote; “The problem about the egg and the hen, which of them came first, was dragged into our talk, a difficult problem which gives investigators much trouble.”  The earliest of philosophers pondered the question with considerable depth, because to answer the question is to know the origin of humankind.

A truly fascinating and profound question in deed.  Let’s approach a possible answer from three perspectives; the chicken’s, the egg’s and neither of the two.

(1) The Chicken: If you think the chicken came first well then that would make sense right?  The chicken would “HAVE TO BE” in order for an egg to eventually exist.  This fits for creationists because a Divine will would have created the chicken first so subsequent chickens could be hatched from eggs, and this fits for evolutionists because chickens would have evolved from dinosaurs.

(2) The Egg: If you think the egg came first then this would be pragmatic, evolutionary thinking and speaking of evolution, since it applies to the topic, what exactly is it?    Evolution is the gradual, generational mutation of a species over time.  Now, dinosaurs have been laying eggs long before chickens were on the scene, and chickens just didn’t materialize from a cosmic aether so they had to evolve from dinosaurs.  However this evolutionary change wouldn’t happen throughout a dinosaur’s hunting, eating and terrorizing day…..in other words  the dinosaur wouldn’t wake up one morning and find she was a chicken.  This change would take place during the embryonic stage with in the egg due to chemical, biological, genetic, physical and environmental changes inherited from the dinosaur.  The egg and it’s gradually evolving embryo would be laid and hatched, then another, and another, and another, and another until a chicken eventually poked it’s beak out clucked.  – Corny I know.

(3) Neither: Well this is an interesting point to consider and here’s why.  Human evolution postulates that humankind (homo-sapiens, you and me) evolved from early hominids or…early apes 5 – 7 million years ago.  Now many religious, spiritual, philosophical and even academic perspectives take issue with the theory of human evolution for a great many reasons.  One reason is based on a very common-sense-like question and that is, “where are the bones”?  Sure, archeology and paleontology have over time unearthed some amazing and significant finds that lend to, or from particular points-of-view substantiate the theory of human evolution.  We’ve all heard of the “missing link” which is the evolutionary skeletal system scientist continue to search for that will link early hominid to current homo-sapiens, proving in fact that humankind did in fact evolve from ape.

To date there is no missing link, although in fairness…there have been some very compelling finds, but nothing definitive. 

Now I have no training or schooling in archeology, paleontology, forensic pathology or anthropology and…this is just me here, but besides unearthing relatively complete skeletal systems in a localized area that are either definitively ape, human and sure…a few others that are in-between or all together different, plopping a bunch of fossilized ape heads on a chain of mixed human and ape bones just because the fames and hinges line up does not demonstrate the chain of evolution for me anyway.  

Again, evolution means the gradual genetic, biological, chemical and physical change of a species.  In both cases of the chicken and the egg and human beings, shouldn’t there be thousands if not millions of skeletal remains in various stages of  evolutionary development buried all over the place.  Well, there  isn’t but again in fairness, there are many reasonable explanations for this, however…should the “Missing Link” have turned up by now?  If not…IT, what about one of its clearly distinguishable mutating cousins?

I don’t know, I find many aspects of human evolution suspect, but this reasoning stands for the cosmic chicken and egg because evolution is a slow and steady process.  One of the evolutionary cousins between the dinosaur and the chicken would have been the species to have laid the egg that would hatch the chicken as we know it today.   So…techically in direct relation to the chick and the egg neither came first but some off shoot mutation between the chicken and the dinosaur. 

Now let’s bring the discussion full circle.  An interesting scientific fact: Egg shells can not be reproduced outside the species that laid the egg.  According to a paper written by British researchers  (“Structural Control of Crystal Nuclei by an Eggshell Protein”)who conducted an experiments on egg shells, they determined that the “crystal nuclei” proves that the chicken came first.

Hmmm……

According to the Bible, when God needed to punish or kill someone…he sent an angel.  I’ve often wondered what these creatures might be like and as I considered the concept I asked myself…do I really want to know?  Just imagine a creature that spends it’s entire existence praising it’s God…doing it’s Master’s bidding WITH pride, passion and without question.  A creature bred to spill blood in the most horrible and unimaginable ways as it heralds the word of God.

Ask yourself; would you ever really want to see an angel?  I wouldn’t.  Not Ever!

I have also wondered what it would be like if God got sick of it all of our crap and decided to start over.  The thought of a legion of angels descending from Heaven to do just that, to purge our world of human life was enough to give me the chills.  Interestingly, a few days ago I saw a movie titled: LEGION.  The movie is about just that, God looses his faith in humanity and orders his angels to exterminate the human race.  This is tasked to one of Gods highest ranking angels in his army, Michael who is played by Paul Bettany.  However, (and it is unclear if God factors this variable into his plans or not, I assume he has) amid the plans for human extinction, a child is about to be born to a mother who doesn’t want it.  This child will be the ONE who leads what remains of humanity out of the darkness that is to come.  Michael has a profound conflict with his orders and decides to disobey God.

Michael descends from heaven to see that the child is born and protected and as a General in Gods Army, he knows the details of how the impending attack from Heaven will be executed.  A legion of angels will descend from heaven, possessing the week minded and killing those who who are strong willed and cannot be possessed.

Michael knows where the mother carrying the unborn savior is and gathers enough weapons to take on a sizable invasion force.  He commandeers transportation and heads out to the desert of Las Vegas to a run down gas and go dinner in the middle of no where, owned by a curmudgeon played by Dennis Quad.  Michael arrives at the dinner after it’s staff and customers have had their first confrontation with one of Heaven’s possessed humans.  Michael tells these few about the attack that is to come and arms them to the teeth in the hopes of buying enough time so the child can be born safely.

But God is not pleased when the Michael and the humans look as if they might succeed, so God sends the highest of all angels in his army, Gabriel played by Kevin Durand to deal with Michael’s betrayal.  The confrontation between the Archangels is nothing short of brutal and frightening.

As far as entertainment goes, the movie is a good one and I highly recommend it, but from a philosophical perspective, it really makes you think.  If there is a God and the bible is humankind’s representation of his will and plan, then we as a civilization have to be in the orbit of Gods wrath.  If nothing else, the polution and/or imbalance of Life Force Energy must be nearing its spill point.  2012 prophecy and/or paranoia aside, many feel and have felt for some time that a change is coming.  Something is lurking in the horizon and it feels as if its ready to come forth…and soon.

Did I first think it or did I feel it?

I don’t know if it was all my years of training that kicked in first telling me not to open it because I could feel something amiss…or if I felt something amiss, which triggered my inner voice to say “you know better Derek, release your curiosity, put it down right now and walk away.”  I don’t know which came first, but what I do know one thing for certain… I made a serious mistake by not trusting either warning.

Let me start from the begining…

I have my own a washer and dryer but I prefer public Laundromats.  I’m not entirely sure why…I’d rather leave the house and do my laundry then do it at home.  When I was kid that’s what we did, so maybe its a habit…a tradition even.  It’s an opportunity to kill a few birds with one stone and run some errands while I’m out; maybe thats it.  I have always been comfortable in public and around others so perhaps it’s based on my fondness of being out and about…I don’t know for sure, but one thing is for sure, I always come home with a story.

I’m taking my cloths out of the washer when it must have been in the metal, roller basket I used to move them to a dryer.  It was a small…soft, cloth pouch styled as a $50.00 bill.  I picked it up and felt …“materials” inside.  Using my thumb, index and forefinger I could feel various textures, something gritty, something folded and something that felt like a coin  inside of this pouch.  It was sewn shut, which caused me to notice the stitching, something about the way it was stitched gave me a weird feeling.  I could tell it was slow and methodical stitching.

At first, I heeded the voice in my head’s warning and  put it down, left the Laundromat and went back to my car to read my book.  After 2 minutes I couldn’t stand it anymore…I was having a fight with myself.  I wanted to know what it was, I wanted what was in the pouch but the voice in my mind said, “you know better…not everything needs to be explored, identified and understood…so let it go.” 

It’s not that I couldn’t let it go, I just didn’t want to. 

There was something not right about that pouch and I wanted to know what it was.  So, I walked back into the Laundromat, grabbed the pouch and brought it out to my car.  I tried once more to investigate the contents with my fingers and I could clearly identify that it was in fact a folded piece of paper…as weird as this may read to you, but I determined the folded paper to  be  a denomination of some sort by the texture and sound of the paper.  Then I thought, if there is money in this I will simply turn it in to the attendant, maybe this is someone’s emergency stash of cash or something that got lost in the laundry. 

I decided to open the pouch…

I didn’t want to rip it open so I started to observe the stitching.  I noticed that there was an end that was untied and from there I could use my fingernails to grab one of the tightly stitched loops and pull the loose end through.  What careful and intricate stitching I thought.  After about 10 minutes I was completely taken with how well someone stitched this thing together.  It was stitched as if it was never to be opened again and with that, once again my internal danger sense was spiking.  I mental kicked myself because now I was committed, I had to open it and see what was inside.

I got a quarter of the way down and allowed my impatience to take over and used one of my car keys to pull out the rest of the loose stitching out, and even still…it was slow going opening the pouch.  Finally, I got it open enough to see what was in side.  I was right, it was a denomnation…a $2.00 bill…weird I thought.  But there was something else inside…dried corn, a sea shell, what looked like sand and a strong floral sent.  I sat there and said to myself…”WTF” is this?  I thought, “dried corn…DRIED CORN!”

Then it hit me!

I yelled “SHIT” and closed the pouch and immediately through it away!  I ran into the Laundromat’s restroom to wash my hands.  There was no soap so I pulled out some change and purchased a small, single load box of  beach and washed my hands as hard and as fast as I could.

1. What I felt was Dark Magick…
2. My mind was telling me on both the practical level that this was none of my business, and the spiritual level that something was not right and to leave it alone…

I of all people who should know better.  I decided that my curiosity was more important then the years of knowledge and experience telling me to walk away and let things be.  From what it looked like, it was a simple money/prosperity spell, but depending on the practitioner and the power of belief behind the spell there is no telling what damage if any I could have caused myself or the individual the spell was intended.   

That’s what I get for opening Pandora’s pouch!

I watched the film 2012 yesterday and I sincerely take back my semi-prognostic ranting about the state of California sliding into the Pacific Ocean one day.  While this movie is a fictional account of the end of the world and done so with sophisticated and intense special effects; watching the state of California actually come apart due to powerful and concentrated seismic activity and then…slide into the Pacific Ocean.  This scene caused me to take a serious moment of pause and reflect on the quality of my thinking.

To many, December 21, 2012 is now believed to be the date the world will end.  This date is also the date in which the 5,125-year-long Mayan (Long Count) calendar also comes to an end.  The Mayans believed that on the day this calendar ends…the world ends.  Another interpretation is that the Earth and/or the people of the Earth will undergo some sort of physical or spiritual transformation.  Either way, a great many people believe that this date will be the beginning of a new era.

The concept of the world ending is as heartbreaking as it is frightening and to see the concept played out in your living room in such detail is enough to cause one to pause and reflect upon…take inventory of and process the elements that comprise the sum of one’s life.  All of us has heard the statement, “we have so little time” more then we can possible imagine.  I remember a statement made in a movie called “Meet Joe Black” that accurately represents the truth of this statement, which is “Multiply it by infinity, and take it to the depth of forever, and you will still have barely a glimpse of what I’m talking about.”

We have so little time

In this film…perhaps just over a million human beings survived the aftermath, which made me I think about this as if it were real life.  I thought about many of the confused and conflicted people in the world today.  The substance addicted, the violent, the materialistic and superficial celebrities, millionaires, billionaires, the philosophically deficient, the spiritually numb, the morally and ethically depraved and the ignorant and narrow-minded.  All living their lives without a care or worry in the world, taking everything and everyone around them for granted as bask in the comfort of knowing that their money, power and influence have secured them comfortable lifestyles for the rest of their days.  They have taken steps to see to their wealth, property and standard of living for the professionals they’ve hired to see to these aspects of their lives, have prepared for a great many social, political, economic and financial situations and crises.  However, are they prepare to wake one morning and find that the state they live in falling toward the Earth’s core?  Science proves that nothing is certain, nothing lasts forever and none of us can ever really prepare for everything.

Tomorrow is not promised to you, me or anyone else and that is why we need to live full and rich lives while we are here.  We need to do the best we can everyday to be kind, helpful, consideration, caring, responsible, accountable, loyal, honest, trustworthy, loving, compassionate, honorable, faithful, committed, dedicated, respectful, intelligent, insightful, passionate, cooperative and charitable.  We are not perfect; we all have our problems and situations that come up, which can cause us to shift our focus from what truly matters in life.  Yet, choosing one thing to anchor all other things to, one thing to help shift our focus and attention back to where our hearts and minds need to be…something like the fact that we have so little time will help keep what really matters in perspective.

I often wonder what it would be like for the world to experience such things as depicted in the film 2012.  I ask myself; would it take something on that magnitude to ultimately make the changes the world needs?  What is it going to take for people to wake up and see that life is so much more than sex, drugs and money?  Will it require a systemic systems failure of all the constructs and paradigms that tenuously hold our society in place before people realize chance is necessary?  Will it take an Anti-Christ like figure to rise, seize power and wreak havoc? 

What’s it going to take?

I watched this film and applied the concept to real life and I wept for all the billions of people who think they have time.  I couldn’t help but imagine that the people in the film were the people in real life as they woke to find that those they love were dead or they themselves were slowly dying.  The sudden reality that their fame, fortune, power and influence would not be able to save them.  I wept for ignorance of those who live their lives against the grain of goodness for the sheer purpose of accumulating things and experiencing pleasures all the while thinking they have time to reconcile their lives.  For a long, long time I have been angry and disgusted with society, but after watching this movie, I felt so sorry for society.  As a whole, we are a machine moving onward and upward…using, abusing and consuming everything in our path.  If we can’t stop ourselves, I believe that the planet or the universe will. 

“Nature will choose for itself…from itself” – Dr. Adrian Helmsley, 2012 Film

Star Wars and the Jedi Philosophy galvanized my pursuit of spiritual and philosophical development.  Since the start of my existential journey I have learned so many things; yet for all the answers to the many questions I have had, one most poignant question has yet to be answered…until recently.

The other night (Friday the 19^th 2010) I participated in a round table discussion on the Knights of Awakening, Blog Talk Radio program about The Dark Side.  I can’t say I had an expectation of how the discussion would go, but I knew I would ask some of the most probing questions I have always had about the Dark path in the hope I could gain some clarity as to how and why it is practiced. 

The Jedi Philosophy moved me to explore and develop my personal philosophical and spiritual path, which of course is guided by the interpretations and understandings of the Light Side of Life Force Energy.  However, I believe the path of Light…while guided by the doctrine of Light, is in fact grounded by the notion of pragmatism and oriented by the relativity of the Universe.  The path of Light teaches us to let go of our notions of right and wrong, good and evil, chaos and order…creation and destruction and do what must be done without pride, passion or prejudice.   

Now…this is a slippery slope for intent and action can easily be misunderstood as Dark Side alignment if actions taken are done so with no short term betterment or productive value.  The fact that we are servants of the Light does not nullify or even pacify these incriminations; what is truly resides within does this.  However one must know that carrying the title “Ashla Knight” is not enough; we must embody the title by manifesting essence of Light in our mind, heart and soul.  If we are of the Light inside and out…always and forever then we will do well in avoiding “the path” of Darkness.  We can never avoid the Darkness for it is the unavoidable, opposite side of our philosophical and spiritual reality, but we can certainly avoid walking the path.

Now…getting back to the blog talk radio discussion; with Miles & Khaos representing the Dark Side and/or Sith ideology, I felt I could pose several basic questions about the Dark path get truly honest and insightful answers.  First I wanted to separate the layers of Dark Side personification as we know them.  For example, there are the sort who for a multitude of reasons seem to gravitate toward a more adverse…even malevolent philosophy and spirituality.  There are those who just think it is “cool” to stand out and be adversarial just to simple “BE”.  Then, there are those who have found a deep and meaningful understanding of the Dark Side.  They have arrived at this truth in the most profound way and it is these people have an interpretation of the Dark Side that can teach us a thing or two.  Yet these people are few and far unfortunately for most people on the net that claim to practice or follow a Dark Side path are philosophically imperceptive, spiritually immature and/or emotionally unbalanced. 

On this program I got the opportunity to separate these various incarnations of Dark Side interpretations and to my surprise, Miles invited me to the very core of his Dark Side interpretations which ironically was extremely similar to that of Ashla Knights interpretations of the path of Light.  Interestingly both of our ideologies involved several things such as:

(1)   The recognition that we understand and define our reality, specifically our individuality by the notions and constructs we created to help make sense of the world live on and the universe we exist in.  However these notions and constructs are completely incongruent to the reality of Existence.

(2)   In order to know and understand the nature of a thing such as Life Force Energy, you must escape the existing paradigms of interpretation and teachings and return to the very beginning, which are the happenings of the Universe. 

(3)   Accepting that Life Force Energy may not have innate aspects such as Light and Dark.  It may simply exist as an autonomous, omnipresent aspect indifferent well of cosmic life energy.  It is what our philosophical and/or spiritual orientation that affects and/or manipulates our connection to this great well that determines whether Life Force Energy is either Light or Dark.     

It seems that the Dark Side…personified in the real world is guided by the tenets of the Sith Code, but the interpretation of that code and the path itself is effectively and reasonably grounded by a “humanistic” philosophy and not the arch defined in the Star Wars movies.  It was fascinating discussion and while it is one interpretation of the Dark Side it is a most rational and effective interpretation. While this is all very interesting, it is far from the true fruit this discussion produced.  During this discussion, a most interesting revelation came about.  This is a revelation I believe provides the clearest identification of the definitive point of division between the Light and Dark and that revelation was this:

While both aspects acknowledge several profound truths, it is number (2) in the above list that evidences the schism between the aspects.  Ashla Knight’s believe that in order to serve Life Force Energy we must first understand the nature of Existence, which is illustrated number (3) and by applying number (1) every day, all day knowing we will never achieve the physical personification of (2) as we exist in this reality (the reality of the living). 
In other words; we strive every day to achieve something we know we cannot.

According to Miles, the Dark path also acknowledges this truth but they do not recognize the effort we put forth.  They accept that they cannot attain this personification of Life Force Energy and therefore they do not bother with it.  Instead, they embrace and revel in the physical reality of the living, thus embracing a more localized or humanistic perspective.

We strive to achieve the impossible, while they do not bother with it.  This coupled with our individual spiritual and philosophical facets, which (help) determine our Light or Dark orientation is the shatter point between the two aspects.  This I think is a most insightful discovery.

Recently I was checking the web site statistics (ashlaknights.net) and came across an option that allowed me to view web sites that have our name mentioned or content posted.  I will not mention the names of these sites but I was really shocked to read what many had to say about us.  In the early days of Ashla Knights we took a lot of guff from many older and more established web site communities because of our content and method.  Back then we were a Jedi Philosophy web site and community, our interpretation of the ideology was concerned heretical to many.  The irony was I created a community that was more Jedi-like then many of the communities on the net but with a significant difference…it was anchored in reality.

I loved the Jedi Philosophy so much and wanted to honor it by keeping true the tenets illustrated in the fiction, yet make it a “real world” application by examining the movies and much of the fiction as thoroughly as I could.  I then researched the sources Mr. Lucas drew from and used to create the Jedi.  Sources anchored in spirituality, philosophy, science, politics, history, civics and so on.  80% of Star Wars is actually real world constructs, notions, archa-types and situational satire.  From here, it was relatively easy to create an on line web site community that I felt accurately represented what the Jedi Philosophy might be if practiced in the real world.

I’ll be honest, I wanted to change the way things were done.  While there were (and sill are) a few sites that drew wisdom and knowledge from the real world assets and did a decent job merging them with the Jedi Way, a great many sites relied solely on the fiction for guidance.  However, this is nothing more then escapism for adults in a most child-like way.  One thing all the sites I visited had in common was their inability to provide a challenge for their members.  The internet gathers personalities manifesting so many levels of insight, wisdom and knowledge from all around the world.  When one is on line, one can be who ever he or she wants to be, he or she can do what they want to do and go where ever they want to go while maintaining a comfortable level of anonymity.  However, most importantly, one can be as smart and insightful as they want to be simply by thoroughly researching content on line and preparing a well written reply.  Being on line for all, is a way to escape the either the mundane or the difficulty of life.  But that changes when one decides to get involved with an on line community.

I can understand how intimidated community owners can get, I was there…the challenge of creating a site where others can join, discuss and share insights about all areas of life alone is daunting.  Creating a site where the content is based on your interpretation or understanding of construct can be overwhelming.  What you might think is clear, concise and accurately represented is one thing, but to others its another thing entirely.  When you open your doors for business, you quickly discover that you are no longer the sharpest took in the box.  Once you go live, your site and its content are fodder for discussion and critique.  Receiving unpleasant feedback from members and having that feedback echoed on other sites can sting in the worst way and because of this, many site owners do not even consider a training center or academy for it will bring more critique and even ridicule. 

I speak from experience.

I created Ashla Knights never having experienced an on line forum community in full.  I was straight from the real world where you dealt with people who had something unpleasant to say. You went to where they were, you called them up or something…but getting into a mix with someone on line was new and very uncomfortable for me.  In the real would you discuss or debate a situation out to resolution, or you just ignore a person and walk away from them.  On line…while you can ignore a person, whats written hangs there in the middle of the page for all to see and it doesn’t go away unless the writer or admin team decides to delete the topic.  What is said about you and your replies are for better or worse, immortalize in cyber space.  In the real world, if you wind up looking like a fool you can recover knowing that it was a moment in time that will soon be forgotten.  On line, when you look like a fool its out there and you can never forget it because its searchable.

I can understand why many people do not want to expose them selves to that kind of venerability.  By putting yourself out there you invite strangers directly into your orbit; this is not what you want, you came to cyber space to escape this kind of persecution.  While many may never know your real name or who you really are, your on line name and profile become known and compromised and it is as if you substituted one cruel reality for another.  I speak from my own experience.  When Ashla Knights first launched, I got my ass handed to me from every virtual thinker who had an opinion within the Jedi Communities.  People couldn’t understand why I deviated from the what everyone else was doing and why I would attempt an academy that required students to actually work.  Why I would scrape the master to apprentice relationship and default to non-Jedi sources of wisdom and knowledge.  Many could not understand why I did not solely use the Jedi fiction as my handbook for Jedi instruction.  They could they wrap their minds around a system that encouraged off line activity for training and self betterment and recognized the true contribution of having Sith active along Jedi on one site.  The best arguments were over the use and value of having news articles on site.

These people literally wanted nothing to do with the real world yet preached a doctrine that require them to confront it!  I realized many people were not going to push away from the computer and get some sun, so I thought I would bring the world into the community.  OH THE HORROR!  To discuss the world was like holy water to a vampire, many members wanted nothing to do with it.  I was repeatedly asked why and my reasons were:

(1) The real world is our world, you can not run nor hide from it.  At some point you have to log off and deal with it.  As Jedi, these are the things we must confront and deal with it if we are to truly realize the tenets and actualize the mission of the Jedi Way.

(2) Discussing real world issues allows you to use on line what you have learned philosophically and spiritually to debate and reason through your thoughts and arguments as well as others.  It is real time training in a way, for the challenge helps you fortify your training and your path.  (These are the same reasons for my allowing the Sith to participate at Ashla Knights). 

People just didn’t get it and were completely beside themselves.  I departed from what was S.O.P of that day because it was pitiful.  If someone wants to spend their day on line escaping reality then that is their choice to do so, but doing so under the guise of the Jedi Way is a complete contradiction of the philosophy.  The Jedi way is about engaging life directly.  Its about getting involved, asking the hard questions and following the truth where ever it takes you.  Its about empirical examination, philosophical exploration and spiritual reasoning.  Its about self betterment.  Its about being active and engaging, for it is a philosophy that mandates one to ask his or herself to do what it is they think they can not everyday for the rest of their lives.  The Jedi Way is about being organized and prepared.  Its about discipline and patience.  Its about aid and comfort to those who need it.  It is about teaching what you know to those coming up who will walk the path you walk now.  It is about trust and honor, faith and pragmatism, duty and commitment.  To think you can embody all of these while sitting in front of a computer is completely delusional.  These are Jedi that want to swing light sabers, wear robes and call someone that they have not vetted and found to be knowledgeable and trusthworthy…Master.  One should not want to be a Jedi because it is “cool” to be a Jedi; one should want to be a Jedi because of the journey one will take in training and in walking the path.

That is why for me,  things had to change. 

That is why I put myself out there and that is why I will continue to put myself out there.  In the beginning got heckled and it hurt.  It hurt more because I couldn’t confront negativity face to face, but what hurt more was to bite my tongue, step away from the keyboard and think about what I would say.  Now, it does not hurt at all.  Some are the same on line personalities or personality silhouettes, which is a good thing.  The on line Jedi communities are predicable and consistent if nothing else.  The wolves run with the pack and that is where they will remain.  It took me years to figure this out and so not I’m used to it.  While checking the Ashla Knights statistics, I read some of the things people have said about the new Ashla Knights.  Perhaps its because I have a thicker skin, a deeper understanding into the nature of the thing, or maybe I am more pleased at the fact that the typical think of a wild heading bunch really do not get us. 
Yes, in fact that is it. 

I am pleased that people are dazed and confused about Ashla Knights.  One person called us a cult.  Another person wanted to understanding into what we are doing and asked that the Axioms and Proverbs of Light not be referenced.  I was pleased to read this because it validated the truth of my actions by stepping away from the Jedi Way.  People have become so philosophically confused and disoriented that they do not realize they are the very thing they thing they fight so hard to not be, which are agents of Darkness.  Ashla Knights is about the Force…LIFE FORCE ENERGY and it is because of the truth of science and a philosophy understand do we arrive a spiritual conclusion of Life Force Energy (or the Force).  Its interesting, no one has taken issue with the science, but the Axioms and Proverbs of Light were the focus of critique.  This amused me!  Not only have people have become philosophically lost, they have become empirically ignorant.

I’m most pleased with this. 

It tells me that students who become Ashla Knights will be of the character we are looking for to represent the Order of Ashla Knights.  It also tells me that that we have already weeded out much Darkness and therefore we are saved a headache in moderation.  Over the years I have watched the Jedi Communities degrade into the very ideology they seek to poke fights with, which are the Sith.  

I wonder if the Sith laugh at this irony? 

I wonder if they log into Jedi sites and marvel at that fact that they have to do nothing but watch and the Light Siders go at each and everyone else with absolute abandoned for what it is they believe.  However, on some level I wonder if they are angry over this, for I suspect even Satan would not want two hells.  The on line Jedi have become hostages to notions of virtue and ideological terrorists of wielding riotousness as their weapon.  This has been going on for years, long before my time but lately, I cannot no longer tell the difference between Jedi and true Sith. 

I guess that is cosmic irony is realized for the Jedi and the Sith have truly become two sides of the same coin.

Simply put, I do not care about what the small minded, self deluded, philosophically confused, cyber isolationists think of me or Ashla Knights.  If ignorance is what keeps them from our door then let them revel in it.  If we are to be an island in a sea of crazy then so be it.  Ashla Knights has never allowed popularity or fear to influence our actions.  We have always done what was needed to transition to the next evolution and that is why we will continue to grow and evolve.  We are not afraid of truth or change, we welcome and warm embrace.  Others sadly have regressed to the point where they would not know truth and change if it was a burning bush on a mountain.

The on line Jedi Way have become a sad and twisted joke.  A pun used in forum threads and fodder for enlightened followers of the true path.  Their flame is going out and I wonder if I am witnessing either the death of the on line Jedi Way, or witnessing the path being laid for its return from oblivion.  The path is Dark and when it is at its Darkest, someone will will rise to light the way. Either way, I guess only time will tell.  Is there a part of me that wishes Ashla Knights to be an accepted part of the on line communities?  Sure I do.  I would like nothing better to work with our (true) Jedi brothers and sisters, but our philosophy and mission is not based on a popularity contest.  We can not placate ourselves by making others feel superior.

Without pride, passion or prejudice the Order of Ashla Knights will always do what it must, even if it means we stand alone once again.

The other day I was on the telephone with two separate friends.  Both are very close to me and I care very deeply for them, but recently I have begun to feel that I am no longer an adequate person to discuss their problems with them.  I have started to see the great divide between their lives and my life.  They are two of my dearest friends and I will always be there for them, but because my path provides a level of wisdom, knowledge and practice that in most cases helps me  to recognize, identify and effectively deal with many of life’s challenges, I feel the advice I give is often beyond their understanding.  The words are easy enough to understand but the essence the words together embody simply falls on minds and hearts that either can’t comprehend or do not care.

Its not their fault, its my fault.  I know I should simply listen and not speak unless asked to do so, but when I hear the issues  and problems they are faced with, solutions immediately present themselves in my mind and I want to share with them my insights with the hope of taking away the pain and struggle they’re going through.  I have long felt that philosophy is like a foreign language and to speak it, many do not understand.  The more fluent I become, the greater the communication divide grows.  I wonder if will come to a point where all I do is dispense enigmatic platitudes and philosophical scripture like some physician who knowingly and routinely dispenses  a prescription.  Sort of like, “just take two of these and call me Monday morning”.    

One can eventually develop to the point where they find themselves at a place of  completely and utter understanding of things, and advice given from this great knowledge and wisdom can often seem devoid of compassion or empathy.  Sometimes I feel myself on the periphery of this philosophical place.  It reminds me of a parent teaching a child the world no…”no, because I said so thats why”.  Or trying to save a child the time and energy of failure, “don’t do that, trust me … you’ll thank me later”.  Children need to find out things for themselves, they need to test the boundaries of their world and often there is very little grown ups can say or do to curb this behavior.  I guess that never goes away, but unlike a child testing his or her environment, grown ups test the boundaries of their reality with pain and suffering. 

Albert Einstein said the definition of insanity was the act of doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results.  Perhaps there is an innate measure of insanity that enables us to continue to crash into philosophical, idealogical, spiritual and empirical walls over and over again hoping that the result will be different.

Honestly…it’s not about, “why won’t they listen to me”?  Its about why won’t they learn and in doings so, my advice might resonate with them and actually help.  I was upset when I got off the phone the other day and I knew that by that feeling what I felt I had failed.  I didn’t fail my friends though, I failed myself for I had lost my objectivity.  I know people and I know these two particular people quite well and I should not have been easily effected by their close-mindedness.  I sat and contemplated my emotions and I arrived at why I was upset and angry and it is because I was being selfish.  I was putting my wants and desires before their needs.  I wanted them to stop crashing into the same walls and my desire for them to hear my words and immediately see reason cause me become impassioned. 

That was wrong.

My path puts life in perspective FOR ME, and I was trying to push my insights, interpretations and understandings upon others.  The truths I understand, accept and rely upon are not those others rely upon, but because I care for these individuals, my emotions clouded this truth and therefore pissed me hell off.

I have to be mindful and always consider the origin of my thoughts and advice when dealing with those who are not on my path.  I want the best for those I love and want them to not have to suffer or to experience pain, but some must learn on their own.  It just hurts me to see them to see them continually hurting themselves.